How many times have you looked in the mirror and was completely happy with what you saw staring back? How many times have you told yourself to get out of the bed and get on the treadmill or get to the gym? How many times have those jeans that fit like a glove just 6 months ago barely come up past your knees?
In this age of social networking, Iphones, DVR's and movies at the click of button its easy to lose focus of your appearance and become complacent.
It's especially difficult for females to locate the motivation and desire to not only get in shape, but to STAY in shape.
And for all of those women who lie about their weight, please stop.
Stop lying to men.
Stop lying to your doctor.
Stop lying to the DMV! You're not fooling anyone!
Just because you may have found a way to hide the extra pounds with a Vicky Secret garter belt or squeezed into a certain outfit you put together doesn't make it any better either.
If you put a dress on a pig its still a pig.
Some women have gotten way too comfortable with being lazy.
This is primarily addressed to those that think they have it going on without ever putting in the work to get there. You know the kind that only post the Facebook picture from the neck up. Or the one that thinks her booty looks good in a $400 pair of Roberto Cavalli jeans but her flabby midsection is dripping over the waistband. Can you say muffin top....Let's get real ladies!
Sure there are many factors that may lead up to weight gain such as; pregnancy, depression, stress, medication, a medical condition, and i'll even throw menopause in there. But this is for the capable women. The girlfriend/wife who used to be hot as a pistol that just decided to shut it down, roll around the house and dare anyone to question or address all this new flesh she accumulated.
Did you ever think this may be one reason that he may not be that into you anymore? Hmmmm...
You know who you are!
And its time to do something about it!
No more midnight trips to the refrigerator.
Stop with the second helpings.
Leave the junk food ALONE.
Know the difference between SIMPLE and COMPLEX carbohydrates and most importantly, GET ACTIVE.
Newton's Law is basic common sense. A body at rest will stay at rest. So go for a run, jog or even a simple walk through the park a couple times a week.
Trust me, not only will you eventually look better but you'll feel better!
Love....
10 Painless Ways To Lose Weight
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ReplyDeleteI was watching a tv show last week and this woman was renewing her wedding vows to her husband after 20 years, so she asked the women that was in her wedding party if they could wear their brides maids dresses that they had worn 20 years ago. Talk about comedy, one out of four of the ladies fit into her dress perfectly the others not so much. One lady (Joan Rivers) just cut her dress up the back and walked down the isle with her bra strap and everything showing. I rewound my DVR twice because I was laughing so hard. With that all being said there is NO WAY IN HELL that I could fit into either of my prom dresses from 1993 or 1994. A few years ago I tried my dresses on once just for the hell of it and the dresses got right above my knees and stopped.. I cracked up but it really wasnt funny. This post is the truth and often times a lot of us women over look our flaws because we get away with it. As long as someone is still saying that we look cute/sexy we get a little relaxed. Blunt honesty hurts but it is needed sometimes for a reality check.
ReplyDeleteThis chubby girl is no longer letting her gym membership go to waste. I am tired of squeezing my fat ass into my jeans and the jeans are squeezing the life out of me, and yes I see that muffin top hanging over the top of my jeans and it is not sexy or cute but I cover it up with a nice shirt or a sweater and keep it moving.. smh at that.
Now if I can stay motivated to work out and eat better it would be great.. wish me luck.
Good luck Tennell! Thanx for sharing...
DeleteI hope you're planning on writing a Part-2 dedicated to men. Just as many men have the same issue; it's not specific to one gender inasmuch as it is to the American culture of fast food and couch potatoism. I also feel some kind of way about a man telling women we need to get in shape without also addressing his fellow man. We are constantly inundated with images of how we should look that are often unrealistic for our bodies. I agree with the idea that we need to be healthy and take care of ourselves, but come on, who doesn't? The reality is that women have an unfair standard of body beauty to try to achieve and we are constantly judged based on how we look, not who we are.
ReplyDeleteThis is not me being critical or judgmental towards women and I'll be the first to say that the inner beauty of most women takes precedence over the physical regardless of appearance sometimes. But I wouldn't necessarily say women have an "unfair" standard of beauty to try to achieve because the majority seek beauty all on their own. Some just lack the ambition. From what I know, most women have a different perspective of what makes them feel and/or look good; such as weaves, nails, makeup, booty implants, botox, tanning, etc. But all that is cosmetic which only alters the tangible appearance and covers up the fact that not taking care of your body is NOT healthy. This is also true for men as well but this particular topic is directed at the ladies. Not as a jab or to disrespect but to promote good health. Heart disease is the number one killer of women in the U.S. so even if by reading this I helped motivate one woman (Tennell) to get healthier then at least I know my words weren't written for nothing.
DeleteThanx for the feedback :-)
I'm going to have to call bullsh*t on your response, Jay, because your whole post was judgmental and critical.
Delete"Some women have gotten way too comfortable with being lazy...But this is for the capable women. The girlfriend/wife who used to be hot as a pistol that just decided to shut it down, roll around the house and dare anyone to question or address all this new flesh she accumulated. Did you ever think this may be one reason that he may not be that into you anymore? Hmmmm...You know who you are!"
There's nothing in your blog that says anything about the potential health issues that result from being overweight or that you're concerned about our heart health. You are calling out women for not keeping their bodies in shape. You briefly mention some possible reasons why they have gained weight, but that's about it. Don't get me wrong, I agree that women, especially women of color, especially black women, need to lose weight and get healthier; I try my best to role model it with friends and family. But if you're trying to promote good health amongst women as a brother who cares, calling women lazy and telling us to put down the pizza is the wrong way to go about it.
I don't personally think its the wrong way to go about it. I admit it's a less than humbling approach at tough love but nevertheless it's warranted to address if even in eye popping fashion.
DeleteNot for the benefit of calling women out or making folks get down on the way they look, but just pointing out the truth; unhealthy living is not conducive to a productive and long-standing way of life. You're well within your rights to call "bullsh*t" on the topic, the article and the response Nicole, but what you're dwelling on is cosmetic. You're throwing darts at the fact that it was written by a guy instead of realizing and accepting the truth that I also see the problem. You're even trying to be a "role model" to your friends and family when it comes to healthier ways of living, so take comfort in the fact that I'm doing exactly the same thing but in my own little bloggy kind of way. From a guy's point of view ;-)
And that's actually the point...the content got lost in the delivery. Maybe if you were a medical expert or nutritionist or fitness guru, your comments, although still incendiary, would hold a little more weight. Or if this tough "love" actually felt like there was love and concern involved. Instead it came across as judgmental and dismissive of what could be underlying the weight gain/out-of-shapeless. I'm not saying there aren't plenty of women out there who do make excuses about why they're not taking care of themselves, but more often than not, it goes much deeper than sheer laziness.
DeleteI can't clearly debate with you because you keep reinforcing my own point for me. Like YOU said, this is directed towards "plenty of women out there who do make excuses about why they're not taking care of themselves"...Exactly MY point...but you're getting ahead of yourself a bit by taking offense to the words and the gender of the author which is why you can't seem to focus on actual content. For arguments sake lets say a woman wrote it. Would the article still be considered judgmental and heartless? Would the comments still be considered "incendiary" to you? Lets put things in their proper perspective okay - No, I am not a medical expert, nutritionist or fitness guru. No, I am not a psychotherapist who is overly sensitive because I have to deal with peoples mental and emotional issues on a regular basis, so everything must be analyzed and scrutinized to assess the reason why a person might be a certain way.
DeleteAs I said, this is NOT directed towards all womankind. There are many underlying factors, that were addressed, as to why there might be weight gain. But yes, sometimes it is just out of pure laziness. We all have been guilty of being too lazy to physically take care of ourselves plenty of times. This was composed for those who are capable of doing something about it but just choose not to. Bottom line, if it doesn't apply then let it fly.
I am overly sensitive because I'm a psychotherapist? Interesting. Clearly, my response is making you feel some kind of way, as you're starting to make this personal. I do acknowledge that your gender plays a small role in this, but if you were a woman saying the same thing, it would still be offensive...not many people find "Get off your fat, lazy ass!" motivational; don't you think if it were, there would be less people struggling with their weight? As a blogger, you totally have the right to say what you think and you don't have to sugarcoat it for anyone. But it's also important to know your audience. If your goal was to inspire folks and to promote a healthy lifestyle for women, as you claim, I'm telling you, as someone in your audience who is a woman, that you missed the mark.
DeleteNot trying to make it personal at all. I'm just ASSUMING that is the reason why you're analyzing every word to rebut the entire point of the what was written. You seem to think that I am being insensitive or deliberately trying to be mean....that is not the case...if it didn't matter to me or if I hadn't seen this problem personally, then I would not have addressed it. But your point is well taken and very appreciated. In the future I will I'll be a little more soft and pink in hopes that the message is a little more easily received. :-|
Delete:)
Delete"If you put a dress on a Pig...its still a pig ". Wow you went in on us women ...as much as I would love to take this topic personal....I won't cause there is some truth to it !....I have to agree mostly with NICOLE because I have been chunky ....big bone...fat ....over weight....and for almost ALL women its a issue we struggle with at one point in our lives ....for me.. weight was an issue for many years ....and don't get me wrong ...I can lose a good 25 or 30 ...but if I don't lose another pound..... I still love me some ...me ....and love the women that I am ..Nicole is right ... women do get treated unfairly and often discriminated against in our nation based on our image ...and let's face it ...there will always be a billion dollar market.. targeted towards women thats geared to portray WHAT WE should look like ...and honestly you can't understand this issue until you have walked in it for yourself...so easier said... than done ....there def needs to be a part 2 ...cause I see more Men looking a hot mess than women lately...just as fat or fatter...often sloppy .....and being UNGROOMED is NOT the new sexy ! I blame some of my ladies for allowing some of there men to look a hot mess ...lol
ReplyDeleteYou're absolutely right Keisha. Men have similar physical and health issues that should be addressed. But I deliberately overlooked that fact because this particular segment is directed towards women. Why? Because most out of shape and unhealthy women have a hard time accepting criticism and constantly use societal views on image as a crutch to support their reasoning to remain in their current state. This has nothing to do with "billion dollar" markets and how women are portrayed on television or movies, its simply my perspective on SOME women and the lack of effort put forth when it comes to being the best possible you.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all...... I never made excuses for being out of shape ....I didn't like to work out and was lazy ...and was good with it.... until I had to renew my mind about my temple(body) ...and being no longer ignorant about my health.........I know hit the gym on the reg...and I love my current state ...#2 don't tell me society does not play a big role in how women view themselves cause it does .....you got women that starve themselves to death over what they think or who they think they should be skinny as... .....#3 and either out of shape or unhealthy NOBODY male/female... likes to be criticized ...especially when its done harshly or not in a loving manner......so next time like Nicole said ...think about your audience.....even tho I know you trying to help SOME women be their best ...and..yeah I know who blog this is ... So keep going ..just watch stepping on my big toe next time.. lmbo
DeleteWHISTLING!!!!!!!!!! YELLING!!!!!!!!!!!! AND WANTING TO EYE ROLL AND LAUGH AT THE SAME TIME! LOL! Granted, I will agree with Nicole that your message contradicts your responses to her replies.... I think it is unfortunate, in a society where women are constantly being inundated with mixed messages, it is very difficult to decipher what would be enticing to the opposite, or in some cases, the same sex. I will say that I am in agreement with some aspects of your message HOWEVER, your delivery?? QUESTIONABLE! LOL! Almost a bit insulting and could certainly strike a nerve at some struggling with these issues... Additionally, I could have been increasingly receptive to your message had you promoted the importance of health! I DO AGREE that the way you "get them, is the way you keep them." So if you were a HOT SMOKING PISTOL, then continue to shoot your gun, shine your pistol and clean it so it remains smoking hot. HOWEVER, to suggest that a man would cheat simply because his woman is no longer "up to par" is a bit shallow. Why not promote a collaborative effort in maintaining the HOT SMOKING PISTOL? Men Gray, bald and put on a few pounds and it is socially acceptable... Women go through LIFE CHANGING transformations when we have children and yet there is no regard to that........ Remember when big breasts were the thing and big butts were a "Black girl" thing? Now everyone wants the booty that we were all made fun of just a few short years ago.... I could continue on this soap box, but it is time to get off, lol! I will say, WOMEN, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES, however do it as a means to live longer and not for vanity.... If it starts with the weight, there will always be something that someone can find to "correct" on you.... KNOW who you are and what you stand for and that is just the beginning to maintaining a healthy you! - Maryann
ReplyDeleteThe message doesn't contradict the response at all. It's just that its clearly an extra sensitive topic. But still some folks just read loosely and between the lines. Sure the overall makeup of the message and delivery is a little harsh because it was meant to be. But the summation and the links within the final paragraph
Delete(No more midnight trips to the refrigerator.
Stop with the second helpings.
Leave the junk food ALONE.
Know the difference between SIMPLE and COMPLEX carbohydrates and most importantly, GET ACTIVE)
and after should suggest that there is a level of care and concern for the health AS WELL as overall appearance of some women. I'm just trying the limit the amount of bellyaching folks do and focus on the actual issues. Stop crying, whistling and rolling your eyes just because you feel a MAN might've called some women out on their sh*t!
Don't you recall how you felt when you got ur first gray hair?? How about the lil weight gain?? I am just saying we all struggle with life's changes! Simply because you added ur two cents at the end, it doesn't take away the STING of ur initial message. You are too smart to sit here and take on a round of "word play" with me.... KNOCK IT OFF!
ReplyDeleteAnd when my hair started turning gray I had a choice to sit there and leave it the way it was or do something to change it back to what I was used to. Just For Men did me RIGHT! Hence, if you're unhappy with your appearance or just want to be a healthier you, then do something about it. If it "STINGS", then good it meant to! ;-)
DeleteDidn't sting for me, lol!! We good, as you can see I have no qualms about aging, 30 did me right and running does me better! LOL! So rock on with ur "Just for Men!" LOL! I ain't mad atcha boo!
ReplyDelete